Recessioncore, Predatory Small Talk, Action + Change
Mars/Uranus conjunction (in Taurus, sheesh)
Oh, hello. A lot’s been going on, huh?
This Mars/Uranus planetary alignment often brings about sudden, unexpected events and upheavals (upheaval sounds so negative! It really just means change). While some might be surprised by recent circumstances, none of my astrologer friends are. The energy of Mars and Uranus together is like a cosmic spark — unpredictable.
The silliest of all is their brief conjunction with fixed star Algol, in the third eye of Medusa. Fans of Greco-Roman mythology may remember her funny hair and that some hero decapitated her. Sometimes the stars have a very morbid sense of humor. More curious still, as all the fine folks who have recently gotten Medusa tattoos know she started out as a priestess, until ultimate Pick-Me, Athena caught the green and sent Perseus after her. I picture Algol as a little laser beam zapping the last couple of days.
“…She started out as an oracle, until ultimate Pick-Me, Athena caught the green and sent Perseus after her.”
I think long-term what we can be sure of is a change to comforts. As a perennial fan of change, I hold out a small hope that this one’s not negative, but structured Saturn’s still wading through dreamy Pisces like a flooded basement, and planet of fantasy and illusion Neptune’s about to begin a new, very long cycle. What we need is a new start, but those aren’t always comfortable.
A Saturn native, Taurus (the sign these two heavenly bodies are conjoining or aligning in) rules my fifth house of emotional/attitudes toward creativity, and how one finds joy in life. To bring it back to writing, I’ve been reviewing a lot of stats trying to determine where my book (the first of a trilogy) might shake out in regard to marketability. There’s been a marked pivot away from multi-book deals and toward standalone novels.
It’s so strange because I’m finally wrapping up this book I’ve spent so long on, and I’ve found myself thinking more and more about this other novel I’ve had in my mind since I was probably about 22 or so. (I need a while to let things cook, okay?) This brings me to a really difficult decision: Instead of trying to pitch my trilogy do I stop just short of the submission stage and finish this other book first? For those of you that might not be familiar with the market, a successful standalone can really launch the value of a later trilogy, and if the publishing world isn’t buying multi-book ideas at the moment (the publishing world’s version of recessioncore maxi-length skirts), do I do the difficult thing and shelf it for a little while?
“…If the publishing world isn’t buying multi-book ideas at the moment (the publishing world’s version of recessioncore maxi-length skirts), do I do the difficult thing and shelf it for a little while?”
My inclination is to rush in excitement to finish something, celebrate that I did it, and learning the lessons from the imperfection. But that isn’t always the best way. I just can’t tell if now is one of those times.
On the Subject of Athena and Jealousy, Anxiety, & Tension
To tell you a little about myself, I’m a very resilient and capable person that hides away a very sensitive, rich interior life. As such, I have so many friends that are very sensitive, wonderful people (I’ve learned so much from them). I’ve been thinking a lot about them lately. Maybe, reader, you find yourself among them.
Picture yourself making chit-chat (anywhere, work, grocery store, PTA, intermural, family event). Maybe you’re passing the time, maybe you’re breaking the ice. Have you ever had someone use this sociological bonding ritual as a tool against you? You can tell it’s happened because in the moment, a little tweak or shock occurs somewhere inside of you, and then you inevitably leave the conversation feeling drained, uneasy, and even violated.
This is predatory small talk. It’s calculated, manipulative, and employed by a party to the conversation when they feel a negative emotion (any) and as a result feel the need to seize control of the interaction. It's often subtle, making it difficult to pinpoint exactly what feels off about the exchange. The person initiating this type of conversation might be trying to extract information, assert dominance, or create a power imbalance.
Here are a few signs:
Invasive Questions/Presumption of Intimacy: They ask personal questions that seem inappropriate for the context or your level of acquaintance.
Persistent Steering/Non-empathy for your redirects: They continually steer the conversation back to topics that make you uncomfortable or that serve their interests.
Subtle Undermining/Backhanded Compliments: Their comments might subtly undermine your confidence or make you question your own opinions and feelings.
Energy Drain: After the conversation, you feel emotionally exhausted or uneasy, even if you can't pinpoint why.
I often forget people do this, since I’m older and have been very diligent about who I let into my life, but it pops up here and there. It can easily happen at work or new clubs or things of that nature. I feel the need to let my sensitive friends know, some of whom have been dealing with this lately, and some of whom will be dealing with this as a result of some extra spicy Mars energy and this weird, manufactured bi-partisan cleft we will be further feeling (I hear some of you scream: “HOW?!”) in the coming months: You can’t deal with predatory small talk the way your instincts may tell you to (if you can help it).
Think about it, someone is purposefully making you feel really awful, and your natural inclination will be to tell them to STFU (maybe that’s just me). But by the nature of the manipulative element they’re employing, you will certainly be overreacting or “misunderstanding” them, and likely making a scene. Worse yet, you’ll be using and escalating their same domineering energy. This will make you inevitably feel just as bad (or at least it should — if it doesn’t you may be the perpetrator of a little predatory small talk to others, so brace and scan yourself just to be safe). Then again, if you do nothing, you absolutely will leave the conversation feeling even more awful that you let yourself be a doormat.
So instead, if you can be honest, set your boundaries (and stick to them) and leave graciously. You don’t owe anyone information about your personal life or feelings, and you don’t need them to see your perspective.
BUT IF YOU CAN’T LEAVE: Ask them questions. Take a breath, ask them what they mean. Take a breath, ask them how they feel. Take a breath, tell them you’re a little bummed. After each breath you’re looking for an out. You take the spotlight off of you and just be too boring (or too complicated) and let it fizzle.
Nine times out of ten it will be some form of anxiety this other person is dealing with and they might not even be aware of what they’re doing. Nine times out of ten your empathy will kick in and they will feel it and you will both be humanized by the endeavor.
That other one time out of ten, you’ll get out of the convo scott free, get to take a big relaxing sigh, and make a mental note to steer clear of the vampire. But I know we’re going to need a whole lot of empathy in the coming days, and I really hope all of my readers, and everyone you know are all going to be okay. And maybe we can make it okay for other people as well.
Until next time: Meditate.
Nico
PS, I’m always looking for patterns and trends, so if you know, let me know which house Taurus rules in your natal chart. We can see what we can glean about what the conjunction means for you!